User:Redpet241

Alright everyone listen up, i am RedPet241. I literally have the universe's smallest penis. I have to masturbate by sticking my abnormally small penis into a cheerio. i use my tears as lubricant. I'm just soooo traumatized from my uncle damien touching me in my no-no's. but because his penis is sooo large that i could fit my computer in my asshole. my girlfriend was made in china, packaged in washington, and she lost her "virginity" as well as mine in a walmart bathroom. (p,s. she's a blow-up doll.) our aniversary is october 20th. i'm gonna get her a new friend because she's lately gotten tired of madilyn and hilga. when i'm not playing red dead redemption, i am fingering my milimeter-peter. i am an intense neo-nazi. i fought in both world wars and i am madly in love winston churchill, the crazy large and in charge nazi popcorn inventing bastard. i hire illegall imagrants from home depot to choke me in shower......... sweet music to not tight wet little asshole.my uber favorite song in the whole world is Its Raining Men by The Weather Girls......... hallelujay!!!! the one thing i love more than masturbating and playing red dead redemption combined is playing with toy choo choo trains.some times i like to pretend the tunnel is my wet gaping asshole. i have no talents once so ever.the closest thing i've ever done is playing an instument is trying smoke on the water on easy. (guitar hero 1 on the playstation2). only to faill it 7% through my nickname at my "alternative" school is mr. mega goobage. the only other band i listen to is......... NICKELBACK   ***gasp***  my favorite telivision show is Project Runway. i am crazy about the twilight series. GO TEAM EDWARD. Robert Patenson gives me such a raging clue. when i see him i just wanna pray and spray clue glue all over him masculan face.my favorite football team ever on hyperspeed 7 are the uber perfect unstoppable clevlend browns. mr favorite movie is brokeback mountain. yesterday i got home from my family pediatrician he says i'm not start puberty til i'm 19.......... awesome maybe just maybe i can fulfil my life long dream of being a suprise guest star on everyone loves raymond because brad garrett is soooooooooooo dreamy