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John Marston Quotes This is a quotes page. Quotes must be typed as they occur in-game, and may have spelling and grammar errors. Before correcting apparent errors, verify how they appear in-game.


These are quotations by or related to John Marston.

Campaign (Redemption)[]

  • "It's wanting that gets so many folk in trouble..." (John to Bonnie MacFarlane)
  • "Some trees flourish, others die. Some cattle grow strong, others are taken by wolves. Some men are born rich enough and dumb enough to enjoy their lives. Ain't nothing fair. You know that." (One of his first conversations he had with Abigail at Beecher's Hope in the game)
  • "I have a son at home and a daughter in heaven." (John to Luisa in Father Abraham)
  • "They told us there was a prize when you got to fifty." (After being berated by Edgar Ross over having robbed forty banks in his earlier years)
  • "My side ain't chosen. My side was given."
  • "One of them machines can turn men into angels..." (To Jack, on aeroplanes)
  • "I just know that there are two theories when arguing with women. And neither one works." (To Bonnie MacFarlane)
  • "We all need friends, old timer. We die alone, but we live among men." (John to Clyde Evans in Water and Honesty)
  • "It ain't no secret I didn't get these scars falling over in church."
  • "I left the gang after the gang left me."
  • "I'm many things, most of 'em bad. But a man of political principles? No." (To Landon Ricketts)
  • "Men are born, and then they're formed. At least, that’s how I see it." (John to Marshal Johnson)
  • "People don't forget. Nothing gets forgiven." (To Bonnie MacFarlane)
  • "Uncle, well he's not my uncle... as far as I know, just an old dog who's as lazy as a lizard on a hot day. The kinda feller laboring under the delusion that age brings wisdom." (John describing Uncle to Bonnie MacFarlane)
  • "Listen to your boss, Jonah. There's a good boy. Otherwise I'll put a hole in your hillbilly head and watch your tiny brain drain out."
  • "That dog ain't too bright, but he seems loyal."
  • "I think there's some schoolchildren down the way you can go and frighten." (To Jonah)
  • "You want me to shoot you in the head right now for that poor girl?" (To Raul Zubieta)
  • "I hear you speak and suddenly I'm reminded of how the people I respected most in my life had a problem with authority."
  • "You and West Dickens are so crooked, you could swallow nails and spit out corkscrews."
  • "My name is John Marston. You wanted to speak to me." (To Jonah, believing him to be Marshal Johnson)
  • "I'm here to capture or kill Bill Williamson."
  • "Now, if you don't mind, I'd hate to spoil such a beautiful afternoon on such beautiful land with any further unpleasantries."
  • "I, too, have a family, friend. And so that we may see our families again I suggest we part ways amicably."
  • "I hate to take money from a lady, Miss..."
  • "You always got a plan, Dutch."
  • "Then just give up, Dutch!"
  • "It didn't have to be this way, Bill!" (To Bill Williamson in "An Appointed Time")
  • "Stay and fight me, you coward!" (To Bill Williamson in "An Appointed Time")
  • "It's time to stop running, Bill!" (To Bill Williamson in "An Appointed Time")
  • "I thought you was tough! Stand and fight!" (To Bill Williamson in "An Appointed Time")
  • "I'll hunt you to hell and back!" (To Bill Williamson in "An Appointed Time")
  • "When a man with a singsong voice tells me to fuck off, it ALWAYS concerns me, boyo." (To Alwyn Lloyd)
  • "Those sons of bitches would steal a coin off a dead man's eye." (To Bonnie & Drew MacFarlane regarding the Federal Government)
  • "If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'." (To Abigail in "Old Friends, New Problems")
  • "I'll give you a bad case of "someone just shot me in the head" if you don't hurry up." (To Uncle)
  • "Now I ain't the judge, but...as it turns out, it's you or me. The way I see it, might as well be you." (To Javier Escuella in "The Gates of El Presidio")
  • "You should be glad to have him at all." (John responding to Archer Fordham's criticizing him about Javier Escuella, if the player kills Javier)
  • "Finally! Now about that stew..." (After completing "Pestilence")
  • "So it would seem." (Numerous times)
  • "You'll be the first to know when I kill you, I promise." (To Abraham Reyes)
  • "I've met some sick bastards in my life, Seth, but you... you're special."
  • "If you say so." (Numerous times)
  • "Irish, I've met enough men like you to last me a lifetime!"
  • "I'll see what I can do." (Numerous times)
  • "It reeks of miracles back here!" (To West Dickens)
  • "You're as useless as a lawyer at a lynching. Damn you old man, this is my son! If anything happens to him you'll wish it was you that bear attacked!" (To Uncle)
  • "If you win power, remember why you wanted it." (To Abraham Reyes)
  • "I'm going to hand you over to them and watch them tear you limb from limb... I'm just kidding" (To Professor MacDougal)
  • "Of course, my angel." (To Abigail)
  • "Be honest though, it tastes bad enough to kill a man." (About Abigail's cooking)
  • "Do you want me to take out a gun and blow a fucking hole in your head, right here, right now?!" (To Archer Fordham)
  • "Don't be too eager to grow up. It ain't as much fun as it looks" (To Jack)
  • "It's not here! That lying sack of shit!" (After completing A Frenchman, a Welshman and an Irishman)
  • "He ain't gonna to be no frontier gunslinger, killing and running in no gang though. That way's over. Railroads and government and motor cars and everything gone and done away with all of that." (Talking about Jack)
  • "Oh darling. I never thought I'd see this day again." (Upon seeing Abigail)
  • "I'm a semi-literate farmer and hired killer. I ain't in the power game." (To Abraham Reyes)
  • "Ain't no trouble Abigail. Ain't no trouble. I love you." (John’s last words to Abigail)
  • "Now go. Git." (last words)
  • "While there are guns and money, there won't be any freedom, Luisa."
  • "Hold your excuses, old man, until you figure out which one to use" (To Uncle)
  • "Abbie... I hope you learned to cook." (To Abigail, after reunion)
  • "Every man has a right to change, a chance of forgiveness." (To Jack)
  • Give me that! I'm your old friend amnesia. And I've come to tell you, if you ever pretend to forget my name or your debt to me again, I'll make sure you reach heaven before these two ladies. (To Irish)

Campaign (Redemption 2)[]

  • "I treated Jack bad, Abigail too. I didn't want to believe he was mine." – John to Arthur.
  • "I never thought I'd say this, but it's good to see you, Arthur Morgan." – John when being rescued by Arthur and Javier.
  • "Why are you so interested in my life? Haven't you got one of your own?" – John to Arthur.
  • "Sometimes I wonder if things are ever the way we remember 'em, if we were ever who we thought we was." – John to Arthur; a line the latter remembers during "A Fork in the Road", if his honor is high.
  • "We may have shared a saddle, O'Driscoll, but we ain't friends." – John to Kieran Duffy.
  • "Jesus! What part of your philosophy books cover... feeding a feller... to a goddamn alligator, Dutch?!" – John to Dutch, after the latter kills Angelo Bronte.
  • "We should have killed him months ago!" – John to Arthur, referring to Micah after discovering his treachery.
  • "But you're my brother." – John's last words to Arthur (if the latter helps him escape).
  • "M-Marston, only folk around here call me 'Milton'. Sort of a joke I guess..." – John explaining his name to Ansel Atherton.
  • "You see a man whose character changed. I see a man who got found out... for who he truly was." – John to Sadie, about Dutch.
  • "Dutch... killing me won't solve nothing!" – John begging Dutch not to kill him.

Théâtre Râleur[]

  • What's your deal, lady? (female performer)
  • Where did they find her? New York City?(female performer)
  • Get this fire lady off the stage! (Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • This fire lady's pullin our leg! (Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • You ain't American! (Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • What is the deal with her? (Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • Do something different! (Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • Boo! Sing Ring Dang Do! (Robin Koninsky)
  • Pick another song! (Robin Koninsky)
  • Off the stage, woman! (The Mysterious Maya / Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • Bring out the fire lady, she's better! (The Mysterious Maya)
  • No wonder you can't get a husband! (The Mysterious Maya / Antoinette Sanseverino)
  • You're a phony, mister! (Benjamin Lazarus)
  • This magician is a phony! (Benjamin Lazarus)
  • What in blazes is this? Terrible! (Benjamin Lazarus)
  • Bring somebody out that can sing! (Robin Koninsky)
  • You ain't got no talent! (Robin Koninsky)
  • Ain't nobody care what you're going on about! (Robin Koninsky)
  • I hope it bites you! (The Mysterious Maya)
  • Bite her! (The Mysterious Maya)
  • Boo! I hate snakes! (The Mysterious Maya)

Interrogated by Lawmen[]

  • Just minding my own business.
  • Not doing anything sir.
  • No, sorry partner… just… caught my eye I guess.
  • Just passing by.
  • I just heard the commotion.
  • I was just taking care of something.
  • No, sorry.
  • Not a clue, sorry.
  • Nah, no idea at all.
  • I don’t know anything.
  • It’s a mystery to me.
  • I’m just as stumped as you are.
  • No, none at all.
  • No, real shame.
  • No, it’s awful.
  • As much as you do.
  • No, god rest their soul.
  • Of course not.
  • Nothing at all.
  • Cross my heart.
  • God’s honest truth.
  • Just ain’t my business.
  • I swear, I know nothing.
  • Good luck.
  • Good luck partner.
  • I hope you get the bastard partner.
  • Gotta be.
  • Keep at it now.
  • You’ll crack this one.

Knocking out an NPC[]

  • Okay, that's enough.
  • Okay, thank you.
  • Tell whoever you started it.
  • Shouldn't have pushed me.
  • I didn't want to do that.
  • Now stay down!
  • Sorry.

Interupting NPCS[]

  • Oh be quiet you moron.
  • Shut up will you?
  • Shut up, you fool.
  • Really? Yeah?
  • Real clever are you?
  • Shut up already!
  • You’re an idiot.
  • Oh you smart are ya?
  • I said you to speak?
  • Don't even start!
  • Oh, hush now!
  • Oh, shut up!
  • Oh, be quiet. Will ya?
  • You’re a moron, shut up!
  • Oh, just shut your mouth!
  • Don’t want to hear it!
  • Would you listen?
  • Shut the hell up!
  • Hey! Don't.
  • Enough out of you!

Killing an Enemy[]

  • You died real easy friend.
  • I don't know how you made it this far.
  • Not so tough now, are ya?
  • Shouldn't have messed with me, should ya.
  • Ain't so full of yourself now, huh?

Robbing[]

Robbing male NPCS[]

  • Alright partner, money.
  • Give me your money, mister.
  • Okay, give me your money, buddy.
  • Now how about I relieve you of your cash, mister?
  • Mister, hand over your money.
  • Partner, I’m gonna need what you’re holding.
  • How much you got for me friend?
  • I wasn’t gonna rob you mister but now I am!

Robbing tougher NPCS[]

  • Okay tough guy, money.
  • Give me your money, big guy.
  • Cmon! Money, now!
  • Okay boss, your cash.
  • Give me your cash, and don’t even think about it.
  • You ain’t that tough really, give me your cash.

Defuse before robbing[]

  • You know what? Forget it.
  • You know, you’re fine. I’ll rob someone else.
  • Actually, on your way. I’ll rob someone else.
  • Bet you don’t got nothing anyway.
  • What was I doing wasting time on you?
  • You ain’t even worth it, you know?

Robbing former witnesses[]

  • You know, lastly, give me your money.
  • And just to cement our friendship, give me your money.
  • And since we’re such good friends, give me your damn money.

Robbing NPCS (interruption)[]

  • Actually, gimme your money.
  • You know what, gimme all you got!
  • You know what, you’re getting robbed.
  • Hey and uhh, I’ll take all your money.
  • Oh! And umm, I’m gonna have to rob you! Come on!
  • So, I should probably have said this: this is a robbery give it up!

Robbing stagecoaches[]

  • You’re getting robbed!
  • Bad news! This is a robbery!
  • Sorry, but you’re getting robbed!
  • What are you traveling with?! Hand it over!
  • Must have brought some cash for your journey, give it to me!
  • You’re traveling money, now!

Robbing NPCS when spooked[]

  • This… is a robbery!
  • You’re getting robbed!
  • Hand over all your money!
  • This is a stickup!
  • Give up what you got, you’re being robbed!
  • Its a robbery, hand it over!

Interupting[]

  • Oh just hurry up!
  • Shut up and pay up!
  • Hurry up, you fool!
  • Quicker!
  • Come on!
  • Hurry, now!

Persuading[]

  • Quick!
  • Faster!
  • Lets go!
  • Quicker!
  • Vamos!
  • Speed it up!

Antagonzing after robbing[]

  • Guess this will do, now get lost!
  • I guess thats it, get outta here!
  • Okay, now get lost!
  • I guess that’s all I’m getting huh?! So get lost!
  • Fine! Go then!
  • Shit! Uhh, okay I’ll take it! Go!

Rob (Train Robbery)[]

  • Come on, help a poor fella out.
  • I need your money friends.
  • You lot must have something to spare, pay up!
  • Now give me your cash, it's your good deed for the day.
  • All of ya… I'm taking a donation from the rich.
  • To whom much is given. Much is required. Give it up.

Greet[]

  • Okay, well. I’ll leave you to it then.
  • Don’t mind me.
  • You stay strong now.
  • I’ll see you around.
  • Good, well you take care now.

Greet (Lawman)[]

  • Keep up the good work.
  • Mr. Lawman.
  • Hi Sheriff.
  • Sheriff.
  • Deputy.
  • Alright, son?
  • Alright officer.
  • Officer.

Antagonize (RDR 2)[]

Antagonizing Ranch Members[]

Abigail

  • It’s you again… Yep, still the same old you… I keep checking and you don’t change.
  • Don’t you ever get bored of me… I know I would… Maybe you outta get bored more easily.
  • This life woman… It ain’t that easy… No ma’am it ain’t.
  • What kind of people we become… We ain’t the same folks who made Jack… We’re barely the same that woke up this morning.
  • How’s the reading coming along? …Hey it’s an innocent question… You’re defensive, you know that?
  • You got everything you wanted, haven’t you? …I’ve given it to you ain’t I? …Just want some thanks sometimes shit.

Jack

  • Be a better boy, Jack… Just be better… Better than whatever you are.
  • I don’t get you, boy… Just don’t understand… You’re a puzzle alright?
  • Looking after your mother? …Are you looking after your mother? …You owe that woman, and don’t you forget it.
  • Jack… Damn it, Jack… Don’t rile me.
  • What’s with you son? …Cheer up, alright? …Laugh for once in your life okay?
  • Can’t change your parents, Jack… You’re stuck with us… And we’re stuck with you.

Uncle

  • Don’t know why I tolerate you, old man… You are frankly intolerable… I must be a saint.
  • Jesus, Uncle… What’s wrong with you? …Actually what’s right with you, old man?
  • How long do you think you got left, Uncle? …Two years, three? …I’m keen to get started on your goodbye party.
  • Uncle, you ever think about moving on? …I hear Tahiti’s nice, hot down there… Hell’s hot too, either would be good.
  • Just saw you and thought this was a hog farm, Uncle… Only hogs are clean… Probably better conversationists too.
  • Jesus, Uncle did you just fart? …Or is that your natural smell? …Foul creature.

When NPCs get spooked[]

  • Look at you run! You run like a heifer! Run, heifer! Moo!
  • Where are you going off to?! Thought we was talking there! Can’t just run away from your problems!
  • If you’re going to run, you should run better! One foot in front of the other! It ain’t nearly as hard as you’re making it look!
  • Run away! That’s it! Run away!
  • Run away, you little chump! Yeah run away! Next time I’ll kill you!
  • Hey! Where are we going? Where you going, let me know! You want me to come, you gotta tell me where we're going!
  • Good idea, run away. I didn't like you much anyway. But you run pretty good.
  • Goodbye! It ain't been fun! We both can agree on that.
  • Bye now! You won't be missed! Not by anyone, ever.
  • Was it something I've done? I'll try to be a better person. Don't tell me you're running off because of me.

Antagonizing lazy NPCs[]

  • Don’t you got it good? Someone ought to kick you in the backside. Or maybe in the head.
  • You’re a lazy bastard ain’t you? Whatever you say, you’re a genius. A real genius.
  • I hope they ain’t paying you for this. Folks like you, no wonder nothing gets done. Whole country’s gone to hell.
  • Look at you, you useless sack of shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You’re useless.
  • This what you call work? Looks like idling to me. Pity the fool who hired you, you dullard.
  • My God, no wonder the country’s gone to shit. It’s full of useless bastards like you. Whining and doing nothing.

Antagonizing male NPCs (dumb)[]

  • Look at this dumb donkey. You’re all teeth and ears. And very little brains.
  • What’s your problem, partner? Aside from the obvious. But we won’t discuss that.
  • Heard kin around here had a habit of marrying. You sir, are living proof. The hogs that birthed you was siblings right?
  • What’s your problem, partner? Aside from the obvious. But we won’t discuss that.
  • I smell dung. You been rolling in it mister? Or is that what you eat?
  • Did somebody lose an idiot? Cause I just found one. And it’s a real prized specimen.
  • Are you a man, you sure? Cause you walk like a lady, mister. And you smell like a dirty hog.
  • It’s a walking, talking moron. Ain’t that nice? I’d have drowned you at birth.
  • Mister you got weepy eyes, and a sweaty lip. I could smell your soft from 20 paces away. Now I’m closer and you smell a whole lot worse.
  • You okay, tough guy? Because you don’t look okay. You look like a prized idiot.
  • You look pretty dumb. And you sound pretty dumb. Makes me think you might be dumb, son.
  • Woah, you look remarkable. Remarkably stupid. And I’ve seen a lot of stupid folk.
  • What the hell are those clothes feller? Your outfitter’s got something to answer for. When they make you a box, I’ll make sure it fits you better.
  • What’s your problem, partner? Aside from the obvious. But let’s not talk about that.
  • What the hell’s happened to folks in this country? There was a time when men had some grit to them. You just got grit in your teeth.
  • Oh, look at you. A fine specimen. Of all that’s wrong with this country.
  • Look at you, are you tough? Tough like jerky maybe. Tough like old beans.
  • I don’t like you. Any more than your daddy did. And he must have been an idiot as well.
  • What kind of hole did you crawl out of? Can you crawl back in it? Or are you not welcome back down neither?
  • What are you looking at? You dumb bastard. I’ll put you in the ground.

Antagonizing tougher NPCs[]

  • You’re a moron. I said you’re a moron. You heard me.
  • Hey idiot. Yeah you, you’re an idiot. A gibbering, goddamn moron.
  • Hey, big guy. You tough or constipated? My guess is constipated.
  • You’re not tough. You’re an idiot. With a stick up his ass.
  • You act tough. But you look ridiculous. Like a goddamn fool.
  • Fool. Yeah, you heard me. And I used short words.
  • You as dumb as you look? My guess is yes. I knew it, a total moron.
  • Hey, chump. You heard me. What are you gonna do about it?
  • You think you’re tough? Because you look ridiculous. I’ve seen tougher looking school boys.
  • You wanna fight me? You heard me. I said, you wanna fight, you bastard?
  • You eye-balling me? You think you’re tough, but you better be careful. Steak is tough before you beat it.
  • Dumb bastard. I mean dumb like stupid, not dumb like silent. Dumb like you think you might win this fight.
  • Were you dropped as a child? On your head I mean? You might be about to get dropped on it again.
  • That’s a face only a mother could love. To beat until it’s blue probably. Imagine giving birth to you.
  • Hey, I got scars on my face and I’m still prettier than you. I could’ve been chewed up and spat out I’d still beat you in a beauty contest. And any other kind of contest for that matter.
  • You like fighting I bet. But how you like losing huh? It wouldn’t even be a fair contest.
  • You hungry, you big bastard? You look like you like to eat. How about I feed you a big mouthful of dirt?
  • You the big dog in this yard? Or just the biggest yapper. Either way, I’m gonna teach you to heel.
  • You ain’t tough. You might think you are but you ain’t. I’d be happy to prove that for you.
  • You got a really small neck. Makes your head look big. I hope you won’t come flying off when I punch you.

Antagonize Lawman (move along)[]

  • Sure, mostly because… I’m so scared of you.
  • Do you get a lot of job satisfaction?
  • With pleasure.
  • You take this all too serious.
  • Only because I was going anyway.
  • Go solve a real crime okay?!

Antagonize Lawman (final warning)[]

  • Yeah I’m really sorry, for you.
  • Oh be quiet will ya?
  • You’re very self important.
  • You really meant that?
  • Yeah I thought that was just stupid.
  • You just love the sound of your own voice.

Caught by a Witness when seen[]

  • Come on!
  • Damnit!
  • Shit…
  • Aw crap…
  • Jesus!

Combat[]

  • Aw hell!
  • Christ!
  • Goddamnit!
  • Shit!
  • What the hell!

Skinning[]

  • "I can sell this."
  • "This'll fetch a good price."
  • "Oh Lord. This is nasty."
  • "Lie still." *Chuckles*
  • "Ugh. What were you eating?"
  • "This stinks."
  • "Ugh. You stink!"
  • "C´mon, let´s get this over with!"
  • "Tough one, ain't ya?"
  • "This is dirty..."
  • "Let's make this quick."
  • "You stink!"
  • "This is a messy one."

Picking Flowers[]

  • "You little beauty."
  • "That's what I've been after."
  • "That's the flower."
  • "This looks like the one."
  • "That's what I wanted."
  • "Perfect."
  • "I'll be having that."
  • "Ah, here we are."
  • "That's one."
  • "Might as well."

In Combat[]

  • "John Marston! Remember the name!"
  • "My name is John Marston, and you're a dead man!"
  • "I hope you got money for a funeral!"
  • "Try shooting with your eyes open!"
  • "Any army men here? Or am I just shooting women?!"
  • "Just drop the gun, it ain't worth it!"
  • "Guess we can't be friends now."
  • "I dropped 100 fools like you!"
  • "You ain't outlaws, you're idiots!"
  • "You couldn't hit the floor with your hat!"
  • "Why don't you get some friends! Even this up a bit!"
  • "This would be fair fight if you could shoot straight!"
  • (In Mexico) "You are going to infierno, my friend!"
  • (In Mexico) "John Marston, remember the nombre!"
  • (In Mexico) "You must be the pendejos I've been hearing about!"
  • (In Mexico) "You're all going to be muerto!"
  • (In Mexico) "Chinga your mother!" (Fuck your mother!)
  • (After killing a Mexican enemy) "¡Hijos de puta! "(Sons of bitches!)
  • (After killing a Mexican enemy) "¡Mi nombre es John Marston!" (My name is John Marston!)
  • (After killing a Mexican enemy) "¡Buenas Noches!" (Nighty night!)
  • (After killing a Mexican enemy) "¡Come on, Cabrones!" (Come on, motherfuckers!)
  • (After killing a Mexican enemy) "Things ain't lookin' bueno!" (Things ain't lookin' good!)
  • (After killing multiple Mexican Army soldiers) "If you're the army, then you're all doomed!"
  • (After killing multiple Mexican Army soldiers) "They let idiots like you in the army?!"
  • (After killing multiple Mexican Army soldiers) "God help this country if we go to war again!"
  • (When being shot at) "What am I'm doing here!?
  • (When being shot at) "Christ alive!"
  • (When being shot at) "That almost got me!"
  • (When being shot at) "Someone don't like me much!"
  • (When being shot at) "I'm in a bad place here."
  • (When being shot at) "I hope he stops doing that."
  • (When being shot at) "That nearly gave me a haircut!"
  • (When being shot at) "Stop doing that!"
  • (When being shot at) "Man! I almost felt that one."
  • (When being shot at) "That fella can shoot!"
  • (When being shot at) "I need to move."
  • (When being shot at) "How's he getting close?"
  • (When being shot at) "Too close."
  • (When being shot at) "Stop shooting at me!'
  • (When being shot at) "Guess it's too late to talk about things?"
  • (When shooting a bird) "There's one for the pot!"
  • (When shooting a bird) "Never did like birds."
  • (When shooting a bird) "Right on the wing!"
  • (When shooting a bird) "Yes!"
  • (When shooting a bird) "That's better."
  • (When shooting a bird) "That's a kill."
  • (When shooting a bird) "Down you come."
  • (Shooting a wild animal) "Bullseye!"
  • (Shooting a wild animal) "And that makes you mine".
  • (Shooting a wild animal) "Sorry about that, old friend."
  • (Shooting a wild animal) "Stupid animal!"
  • (Shooting a wild animal) "Blame Darwin!"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "What is wrong with you, Marston?"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Now I'm actin' real crazy."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "I really am a sad, sick man."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "I guess that ain't, really hunting!"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Someone should shoot me."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Man! I'm one sad son of a bitch!"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "I gotta stop actin' like a crazy fool!"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Wish I knew why I did this stuff."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "I need help, fast."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Yep, I was right. That Didn't feel good."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "What's wrong with me today!?"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Better than starving to death!"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "That Dog never did no harm."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "What did I do that for?"
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Poor dog, better off."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Look kinda rabid."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Heel !" *chuckles*
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "You didn't look good, boy."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Damn what did I done."
  • (Shooting a domesticated animal-Dog) "Down boy! *chuckles*
  • (Shooting a horse with Hostile rider) "I'm Sorry, I'm kinda crazy today." *chuckles*
  • (Shooting a horse with Hostile rider) "Next time, I'll make sure to shoot you, not the horse!"
  • (Shooting a horse with Hostile rider) "Didn't like the way that thing was looking at me!"
  • (Shooting a horse with Hostile rider) "Ya lucky I chose the horse!"
  • (Shooting a horse with Hostile rider) "Sorry about the horse!"
  • (Shooting a horse with Hostile rider) "You look like you needed some exercise.
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "Well that worked!"
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "I'm getting good at this."
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "I think like I got my eye back!"
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "Like falling off a horse!"
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "They say I'm passing."
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "Nice."
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "I guess's that, then."
  • (After using Dead-Eye while in combat) "I Guess I'll make a gunman after all!"
  • (After using Dead-Eye while in combat) "Not bad Marston!"
  • (After using Dead-Eye while in combat) "Who's next!?"
  • (After using Dead-Eye while in combat) "Anybody else!"
  • (After using Dead-Eye while in combat) "This is gettin' ugly."
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "I knew I could shoot."
  • (After using Dead-Eye) "Not bad."
  • (While wielding knife at oncoming enemy) "You're gonna drown in your own blood!"
  • (While wielding knife at oncoming enemy) "Trust me, I'm a surgeon!"
  • (While wielding knife at oncoming enemy) "I'll carve a smile on that face!"
  • (While wielding knife at oncoming enemy) "I hope you bleed good!"
  • (Killing someone at a campsite) "Murdered and robbed on the same day."
  • (Saving man from wild animals) "We all have problems, and we must solve them together, or we die alone."
  • (After lassoing a person) "I say you're losin' this argument."
  • (After lassoing a person) "Ain't this pleasant."
  • (After lassoing a person) "Looks like I got you now."
  • (After lassoing a person) "Heeeello!"
  • (After lassoing a person) "Hi there."
  • (After lassoing a Hostile Rider) "Hold up a minute!"
  • (After lassoing a Hostile Rider) "Can I ask you a question!"
  • (After lassoing a Hostile Rider) "Get down from there!"
  • (While hogtying a man) "You having fun mister."
  • (While hogtying a woman) "Ma'am be quiet!"
  • (While hogtying a person) "Friend, you're screwed."
  • (While hogtying a person) "There ain't a polite word for what you're in!"
  • (While hogtying a person) "I guess you say you were in the shit mister."
  • (While hogtying a person) "Playtime's over my friend."
  • (While hogtying a person) "Now quit your annoying."
  • (While hogtying a person) "Welcome ta' hell on earth mister."
  • (While hogtying a person) "You having fun yet."
  • (While hogtying a person while in combat) "Don't make me cut your throat!"
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I can only blame my childhood for so long."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "Sometimes I feel like a sick, sad man."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "That felt weird."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "That really wasn't worth it."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "Poor horse,what's wrong with me."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "That weren't nice."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "That don't feel good as I thought it would."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "Your in the way horse."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I guess it weren't your day horse."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "What's happening to me?"
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "Yep! I'm in a strange mood."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I guess someone needs you now."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I need help."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "What's wrong with me."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I need to calm down."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I've got problems, i'm sorry!"
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I'm a sick man, i'm sorry."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I really didn't mean to do that."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I, immediately regret that."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "Sorry about that."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I'm a bad man."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I don't know why I did that."
  • (After shooting a saddled horse) "I don't know why the hell I did that."
  • (After Shooting a hogtied person) "I never said I was a nice fella."
  • (After Shooting a hogtied person) "I'm already headin' to hell."
  • (After Shooting a hogtied person) "Sorry I must've slipped."
  • (After Shooting a hogtied person while in combat) "See! that's what happens!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "I hate to hit a lady, but I guess I will!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Nice mustache by the way!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Come on then woman!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "This ain't no way for a lady to behave."
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Hit me woman!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "If my wife could see me now!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Let's see what you got, you silly woman!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Come on lady!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "What the hell am I doing here?!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Let's go woman!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Hit me, witch!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Not the most feminine creature are you?"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "I don't like doing this lady!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "You asked for this lady!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "You're a fiesty one ain't ya?"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "I feel sorry for your husband!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "This is gonna hurt you more than me!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) *Laughs* "You got heart, I'll give you that!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Woman, you're gettin' on my nerves now!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "Let's do this!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "That's it! I've had it with you!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "I don't like doing this lady!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a woman) "You're a walking, talking, heffer! Now hit me!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "You got some nerve mister!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "We playing Marquess of Queensberry rules?"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "You're going down!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "I've had about enough of you!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "You wanna fight friend?!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "You want a broken nose friend?!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Alright...let's finish this!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Is this how you want it?!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Let's see what you got!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Come on tough guy!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Come on! Hit me!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "You sure you're a man friend?!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "I'm putting you down hard!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Who the hell do you think you are?!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Time somebody taught you a lesson!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Hit me pal! Hit me!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Come on! Let's make this quick!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Come on! Show me somethin'!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "This is about to get ugly pal!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "You messed with the wrong fella!"
  • (When Fistfighting with a man) "Say goodnight friend!"
  • (When in a gunfight with the law) "The law don't work friend!"

Challenged to a duel[]

  • "Someone needs to teach you some respect!"
  • "Sure, I got some time to kill you."
  • "It'd be my pleasure."
  • "Sure, it's your funeral."
  • "I can't refuse a man his dying wish."
  • "You don't know me, mister."
  • "Those are big words, my friend."
  • "I spent my life provin' fools like you're wrong."

Riding[]

  • "Faster!"
  • "Easy up, now."
  • "Slooow up."
  • "C´mon!"
  • "Let's go!"
  • "Easy"
  • "Heeey"
  • "Yaaa"
  • "Slow on up, now."
  • "Go!"

Shopping[]

  • "Hey there."
  • "Hello, friend."
  • "Dear sir, hello."
  • (After selling anything) "That's all I got."
  • (After selling anything) "That's all I have."
  • (After selling anything) "I'll bring more next time."
  • (After selling anything) "That's what I've got for sale."
  • (After selling anything) "I'll be back for more when I pass through."
  • (After buying anything) *chuckles* "Why do I feel like I just got robbed?"
  • (After buying anything) "I dont know how you get away with these prices, mister."
  • (After buying anything) "That's what I need."
  • (After buying anything) "You just got a bargain right there."

Putting hogtied person on horse[]

  • "You comfortable?"
  • "You getting smelly end." *Chuckles*
  • "Shut up and no annoying the horse."
  • "Try not to fall off!"
  • "Don't annoy me!"
  • "I'll ride slow, don't worry."
  • "Relax, or die."
  • "Don't make me give you a beating."

Taunting (RDR 1)[]

  • (When talking to a man) "Looks like the good Lord got your ass and face mixed up."
  • (When talking to a man) "Bet your pa wished he'd pulled out."
  • (When talking to a man) "I hate to see the look on your mother's face when you popped out."
  • (When talking to a man) "Was your mom and dad related?"
  • (When talking to a man) "Just kill yourself now, do humanity a favor."
  • (When talking to a man) "C'mon, at least pretend to be a man."
  • (When talking to a man) "You look like you're about to fill your pants, friend."
  • (When talking to a man) "You ugly, or just constipated?"
  • (When talking to a man) "You look like you come from a close family friend."
  • (When talking to a man) "You one of them tough guys I've been hearing about?"
  • (When talking to a man) "Don't look at me that way, I ain't that kinda fella."
  • (When talking to a man) "Take my advice and give up on life, partner."
  • (When talking to a man) "You given a man a bad name."
  • (When talking to a man) "Smile! What are you so scared of?"
  • (When talking to a man) "Call yourself a man..."
  • (When talking to a man) "Promise me you won't have children, mister!"
  • (When talking to a woman) "Ma'am, you'd be beautiful if your eyes were in the same direction!"
  • (When talking to a woman) "Sorry, miss. There might been a terrible accident."
  • (When talking to a woman) "Dear God! The cattle have been let loose!"
  • (When talking to a woman) "You could try to appear a little less different, madam."
  • (When talking to a woman) "Madam, forgive me, but you're mighty plain."
  • (When talking to a woman) "I've never seen livestock walk upright!"
  • (When talking to a woman) "You should be standing in a field, scaring crows."
  • (When talking to a woman) "Miss, that bosom must prove there is a god!"
  • (When talking to a woman) "You shouldn't keep the merchandise so hidden from the customer, no?"
  • (When talking to a woman) "At least you have a fine behind, madam."
  • (When talking to a woman) "That's some grand cleavage, miss."
  • (When talking to a woman) "Mmm, yeah I'm gonna remember you for later."
  • (When talking to a woman) "I like a strong woman, but not that strong."
  • (When talking to a woman) "You make me wish I wasn't a married man."
  • (When talking to a woman) "Who did that to you, madam? Lemme get 'em!"
  • (When talking to a woman) "Who did that to you?"
  • (When talking to a woman) "Do you still like nature, despite what it did to you?"
  • (When talking to a woman) "Come on, give me a smile! I won't bite, although you might like it if I did."
  • (When talking to a woman) "Why you wearing that dress, sir?"

Looting Bodies[]

  • (Looting outlaw) "Mind if I borrow this, friend?"
  • (Looting male) "To the victor, the spoils."
  • (Looting male) "You won't be needin' this anymore."
  • (Looting male) "Excuse me, partner. I ain't gettin' fresh."
  • (Looting male) "My apologies, mister."
  • (Looting male) "What you got on you, friend?"
  • (Looting male) "What can I say, partner?"
  • (Looting male) "Rest in peace, my friend."
  • (Looting female) "I wasn't going to hell before, but I am now."
  • (Looting female) "What the hell am I doing?"
  • (Looting female) "I ain't proud of myself, neither."
  • (Looting female) "If you were alive, this'd be adultery."
  • (Looting female) "First they shoot you, then they rob you. Nice country."
  • (Looting female) "I'm sorry, ma'am."
  • (Looting anyone) "Just a little somethin' for my trouble."
  • (Looting anyone) "This ain't nice, I know."
  • (Looting anyone) "Let's see what you got."
  • (Looting anyone) "Alright, let's see."
  • (Looting anyone) "Sorry, friend."
  • (Looting anyone) "If it ain't me, it's someone else."
  • (Looting anyone) "Can I have this?"
  • (Looting anyone) "I don't mean any disrespect."
  • (Looting anyone) "First killed and now robbed, this truly ain't your day friend."
  • (Looting anyone) "Someone as well should have this."

Talking to prostitutes[]

  • "Sorry, those days are over."
  • "Unfortunately, I'm married."
  • "I'm a married man."
  • "Haha, I don´t think so!"
  • "Ha, my wife would kill me."
  • "Damn, you ugly."
  • "Sorry, I ain't that kind of feller no more."
  • "I don't think my dear wife would appreciate that."
  • "Haha, not me, miss."

Mini-games[]

  • (While playing any table game) "You got any balls in them pants?"
  • (When someone stands during blackjack) "Do you piss sittin' down?"
  • (While playing poker) "Give me a real card now."
  • (While playing poker) "It´s all coming back to me now."
  • (While playing poker) "Make sure you deal from the top."
  • (While playing poker) "Who invited the lady?"
  • (While playing poker) "Easy there, cowboy."
  • (While playing poker) "I'll check."
  • (While playing poker) "Check."
  • (While playing poker) "You born chicken or you just lost your balls?"
  • (While playing poker) "Do you do your own laundry as well?"
  • (While playing poker) "Now we got ourselves a game."
  • (While playing poker) "Big spender."
  • (While playing poker) "Fold."
  • (While playing poker) "Give me some decent this time."
  • (While playing poker) "Well played, sir."
  • (While playing poker) "Damn!"
  • (While playing poker) "Boring."
  • (While playing poker) "All in!"
  • (While playing poker) "Let's make this interesting."
  • (While playing poker) "I think I'm gonna call."
  • (While playing poker) "Sure, I bet."
  • (While playing poker) "I call."
  • (While playing poker) "Ah, come on!"
  • (While playing poker) "No thanks."
  • (While playing poker) "I'm gonna fold."
  • (While playing poker) "You better give me a real card."
  • (While playing poker) "All ready?"
  • (While playing poker) "Why are these cards sticky?"
  • (While playing poker) "Too much for me."
  • (While playing poker) "Ain't you aggressive."
  • (While playing poker) "Your choice my friend."
  • (While playing poker) "He's bluffing."
  • (While playing poker) "No, I'm out."
  • (While playing poker) "I know your game."
  • (While playing poker) "I think I'll raise."
  • (While playing poker) "I call that."
  • (While playing poker) "I see you wanna play."
  • (While playing poker) "Interesting."
  • (While playing poker) "It's not funny if you don't have a bet."
  • (While playing poker) "I'm calling."
  • (While playing poker) "Bet."
  • (While playing poker) "Hope my luck turns next hand."
  • (While playing poker) "I'm done."
  • (While playing poker) "I'm in."
  • (While playing poker) "Okay, i play some bet."
  • (While playing poker) "Ain't you mighty angry, partner."
  • (While playing poker) "Sure, I'll gamble."
  • (While playing poker, when opponents raise) "Look at you, all pleased with your cards."
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "I smell bullshit. Bluff."
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "Interesting... I wonder..."
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "Are you a bullshitter I wonder?"
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "I saw your eyebrow twitch!"
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "I'm not a bullshitter, amigo."
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "Haha, we got a joker here"
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "Now are you full of shit, I wonder?"
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "Why are you sweatin'?"
  • (While playing Liar's Dice) "Hmmmmm... you look like a bull-shitter."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "Okay, money is down, mister."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "This gonna be easier than I thought."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "Good, but not good enough."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "And you even didn't lose a finger."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "Not bad."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "I thought we were trying to do this quickly."
  • (While playing Five Finger Fillet) "Let's see if I can match it."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Good throw."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "You're pretty good."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "What was that?!"
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Well thrown."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "That's a beauty."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Not bad."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Very nice."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "I'm avaliable for private tutoring."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Take a look at that throw."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Well done."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "That's better."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Look at you."
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "You've done this before!"
  • (While playing Horseshoes) "Did you see that?"

Miscellaneous[]

  • (While firing a Gatling Gun) "THIS IS THE FUTURE!"
  • (Getting ready to fire a Gatling Gun) "OKAY THEN!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "Ah, good Lord above!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "I don't believe it!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "Damn!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "Ah, shit!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "Damnation!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "Crap!"
  • (Failing a Mission) "Ah, Goddamn!"
  • (While breaking a horse) "Oh, shit!"
  • (While breaking a horse) "C'mon, baby! C'mon!"
  • (While breaking a horse) "Oh, this ain't good!"
  • (After successfully breaking a horse) "See? We're friends now."
  • (When a companion falls behind) "Hurry the hell up!"
  • (Drunk) "Do you know who John Marston is, 'cause I don't."
  • (After being challenged by a hunter to collect pelts) "Alright, but I warn you I'm good."
  • (After losing a sharpshooter's challenge) "I wasn't even trying."
  • (After winning a sharpshooter's challenge) "Keep trying, you'll get there eventually."
  • (When horse gets stolen) "You think I won't find you?!"
  • (When taming a horse) "You're mine now!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Steady!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Oh shit!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Goddammit!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Come on, come on, come on!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Ohh No!"
  • (When taming a horse) "This don't feel too good!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Come on, baby!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Ohhh, shit!"
  • (When taming a horse) "Nearly there"
  • (After taming a horse) "Relax, we're friends now!"
  • (Collecting Gold) "Maybe my luck's beginning to turn!"
  • (Collecting Gold) "What have we got here?"
  • (Collecting Gold) "Maybe there is a God!"
  • (Collecting Gold) "Now take a look at that!"
  • (When Cutting a person free) "I'm going straight to heaven for this."
  • (When Cutting a person free) "Just hold still, or I might stab you by accident."
  • (When Cutting a person free) "Your lucky I'm in a good mood."
  • (When Cutting a person free) "I guess I didn't kill you after all."
  • (When Cutting a person free) "Just stay calm."
  • (When Cutting a person free) "Don't annoy me or I'll do it."
  • (When Cutting a person free) "See You'll Soon Be Free."
  • (Greeting a Mexican person) "Si, hola, buenas... uh... hola."
  • (Greeting a Mexican person) "Hola, señor"
  • (Greeting a Mexican person) "Bueno, señora"
  • (Greeting a Mexican person) "Hola"
  • (Greeting a Mexican person) "Yeah... urgh.. see... Hola."
  • (During a gunfight in Mexico) "John Marston, remember mi nombre!"
  • (During a gunfight in Mexico) "You must be the pendejos I've been hearing about!"
  • (During a gunfight in Mexico) "You're all going to be muerto!"
  • (During a gunfight in Mexico) "¡Chinga your mother!" (Fuck your mother!)
  • (After a camp fire story) "I know an old drunk who would love that one."
  • (After a camp fire story) "If only it were true."
  • (After a camp fire story) "Bet that one changes every time you tell it"
  • (Jumping a horse over a cart of hay) YEEEEEEEE HAAAAWWWW!!!!!!!!!
  • (With low honor) "Miss, that bosom is proof that there is a god!"
  • (When being shot at/attacked by an animal) "Stop that!"
  • (When being attacked by an animal) "You damn critter!"
  • (When being attacked by an animal) "You crazy animal!"
  • (When being attacked by an animal) "Stupid animal"
  • (Shooting a man attacking a prostitute) "Get off her, you son of a bitch!"
  • (Shooting a man attacking a prostitute) "What the hell are you doing?!"
  • (After completing Aztec Gold) "That about sums up my luck recently"
  • (When returning a stolen horse) "This look familiar?"
  • (When returning a stolen horse) "Here´s your horse friend"
  • (Pointing his gun at a man attacking a prostitute) "That's no way to treat a woman!"
  • (Pointing his gun at a man attacking a prostitute) "Leave that woman alone!"
  • (When responding to a prostitute) "Unfortunately, I've got a wife."
  • (When responding to a prostitute) "No thanks. Those days are over."
  • (Herding cattle) "Stay together, you dumb animals!"
  • (Herding cattle) "Let's move here, my four-legged friends!"
  • (Lassoing a man attempting to break in) "Get away from there, you damn pervert!"
  • (Retrieving someone's horse) "That thief changed his mind. Here's your horse back."
  • (Retrieving someone's horse) "This one's your's partner."
  • (Returning money to a shopkeeper) "I persuaded him to give the money back."
  • (Hearding Cattle) "Move!, move!, move!"
  • (Greeting man) "Have a good day, sir."
  • (Greeting man) "Good day sir."
  • (Greeting man) "Howdy, friend."
  • (Greeting man) "Dear sir, Hello."
  • (Greeting woman) "Hello there, miss."
  • (Greeting woman) "Hello, my dear."
  • (Bumping into a woman) "Look out, lady."
  • (Bumping into a woman) " Sorry, ma'am."
  • (Bumping into a man) "Watch yourself, mister."
  • (Bumping into a man) "Easy partner."
  • (Bumping into a man) "Look out partner."
  • (Bumping into a man) "Outta my way friend!"
  • (Bumping into a man) "Sorry sir, my mistake"
  • (Bumping a person) "Watch yourself there."
  • (Bumping a person) "How did that happen."
  • (Bumping a person) "You! Run along!"
  • (Bumping a person) "Are you blind! Move!"
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "Looks like people left here in a hurry!"
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "There must be someone here!
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "What the hell went wrong here."
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "Where da hell is everyone!"
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "Wonder What happened here."
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "This is creepy, I wonder what went wrong!"
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "This place look deserted."
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "Where is Everybody."
  • (Entering a Deserted Location/Destroyed House) "Something Don't feel right here."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "I'd advise you to hold still partner."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Hold it right there, partner."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "I guess i'm having a unpleasant day too."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Don't push me now."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Your call friend."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "No sudden movement now."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Now keep those hands where i can see them."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Ain't your day is it mister?"
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Don't make me pull this trigger mister."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "I hope you got insurance."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "You wanna die mister?"
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Don't you move a muscle now."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "This could be your last moment."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "Don't annoy me pal."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "You or me friend. You or me"
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "You want a hole in you friend?"
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "What's next pal."
  • (Pointing your gun at a man) "One move and your a dead man"
  • (Pointing your gun at a woman) "It's alright i'm not going to hurt you."
  • (Pointing your gun at a woman) "Just hold it there lady"
  • (Pointing your gun at a woman) "Alright, you don't want blood on that dress do ya?"
  • (Pointing your gun at a woman) "I'm sorry i was badly raised."

Multiplayer[]

  • (General taunt) "You cheered me up, partner. I like a good joke."
  • (General taunt) "You are all muerto!"
  • (General taunt) "Run away and maybe I won't kill you!"
  • (General taunt) "You're like a stomach worm."
  • (General taunt) "You're good as dead already!"
  • (General taunt) "You look tough, like a chewed up piece of meat."
  • (General taunt) "I'm gonna give you something to remember me by."
  • (General taunt) "You as slow as you look, friend?"
  • (General taunt) "You're finished! You hear me?"
  • (General taunt) "Did you think I wouldn't come for ya?!"
  • (General taunt) "You look kinda inbred, friend."
  • (General taunt) "I'll hunt you to hell and back!"
  • (General taunt) "You're gonna die slow, my friend!"
  • (General taunt) "Looks like the good Lord got your ass and face mixed up."
  • (General taunt) "You couldn't shoot a fart out of your own ass!"
  • (General taunt) "You really ain't up to much, are you?"
  • (General taunt) "Another coward trying to play it tough."
  • (General taunt) "What do you do when you're not pretending to be tough?"
  • (General taunt) "Who the hell do you think you are?!"
  • (General taunt) "How are you not dead already?"
  • (General taunt) "You boys just ain't that tough!"
  • (General taunt) "I'm gonna enjoy puttin' a bullet in your head!"
  • (General taunt) "You ain't foolin' no one with that act!"
  • (General taunt) "Come on! I ain't got all day!"
  • (General taunt) "It stinks of coward around here."
  • (General taunt) "You think you fools can stop me?!"
  • (General taunt) "You look like you're about to fill your pants, friend."
  • (General taunt) "I don't think I've ever been less intimidated."
  • (General taunt) "Why don't you stop trying to be something you're not?"
  • (General taunt) "Don't make this harder than it needs to be!"
  • (General taunt) "Don't act like no hero!"
  • (General taunt) "I've dropped a hundred fools like you!"
  • (General taunt) "Stay and fight me, you coward!"
  • (General taunt) "Look at you - acting all hard and tough as butter."
  • (General taunt) "You'd best shoot me now or this is over!"
  • (General taunt) "Look at you - you're a damn joke!"
  • (General taunt) "Think you're some hard case, do you?"
  • (General taunt) "I'm thinking one of us has gotta die, friend."
  • (General taunt) "Am I supposed to be scared of you or somethin'?"
  • (General taunt) "Look at you - damn parasite."
  • (General taunt) "Come on! I've seen tougher nursemaids!"
  • (General taunt) "Time somebody taught you a lesson!"
  • (General taunt) "Stop acting tough, you fool."
  • (General taunt) "Stop swaggerin' like you're some tough guy."
  • (General taunt) "I'll kill all you sons of bitches!"
  • (General taunt) "You think being a lowlife frightens people?"
  • (General taunt) "Playtime's over, kid!"
  • (General taunt) "It's you or me, friend!"
  • (General taunt) "I'm takin' you all down with me!"
  • (General taunt) "I'll kill every last one of you!"
  • (General taunt) "You know you're gonna die, right?"
  • (General taunt) "Friend, have you got a death wish?"
  • (General taunt) "Somebody thinks they're the wolf in the pack, don't they?"
  • (General taunt) "You should be standing in a field scaring crows."
  • (General taunt) "I just saw your mother suckling her young down in that pigsty."
  • (General taunt) "None of you are leavin' here alive!"
  • (General taunt) "You're as full of wind as a horse with the colic."
  • (General taunt) "This is gonna end badly for you."
  • (General taunt) "Think you're really somethin', don't you?"
  • (General taunt) "I'm gonna give you a chance to kill me, 'cause I'm just that nice."
  • (Winning Poker or Liar's Dice) "See? That's how it's done."
  • (Winning Poker or Liar's Dice) "Don't be too hard on yourself."
  • (Winning Poker or Liar's Dice) "It's only a game, my friend."
  • (Winning Poker or Liar's Dice) "And they say gambling don't pay."
  • (Winning Poker or Liar's Dice) "I think I'm gonna go spend some of my winnings."
  • (Winning Poker or Liar's Dice) "I think we all learned something here today."
  • (Losing Poker or Liar's Dice) "This is turning into a bad day."
  • (Losing Poker or Liar's Dice) "I don't know why I play this game."
  • (Losing Poker or Liar's Dice) "I should walk away before this gets any worse."
  • (Losing Poker or Liar's Dice) "Well, that's me out."
  • (Losing Poker or Liar's Dice) "That about sums up my luck recently."
  • (Losing Poker or Liar's Dice) "It's clearly not my day."

Undead Nightmare[]

Story[]

  • "Come out! I don't bite. Bad joke."
  • "Somethin' funny's goin' on out there!"
  • (After killing Drew MacFarlane) "Sorry mister MacFarlane, you were a good man."
  • (After looting Drew) "More than happy to rob from you, as well."
  • (To Seth after he says that the plague is nothing) "I've seen husbands eatin' wives, mothers eatin' sons, graves poppin' open and the undead risin' up, it sure as shit is somethin'."
  • (To Jack & Abigail after infected) "Probably just a fever"
  • (To West Dickens) "The snake oil merchant who cried wolf."
  • (To Abigail after she suggests making dinner) "Please, don't. We've had enough dramatics for one day."
  • (To an infected Jack & Abigail ) "Jack, be kind to your mother, Abigail, teach the boy right from wrong, both of you, stop bitin' chunks outta people!"
  • (When hogtieing Jack) "If you act like a child, I'll treat you like one."
  • (When hogtieing Jack) "What the hell's gotten into you?!"
  • (When hogtieing Jack) "Maybe this'll teach you how to behave"
  • (When hogtying Abigail) "Sorry darling, but its for your own good."
  • (When hogtieing Abigail) "Now stay there while I deal with your half-witted son."
  • (To Uncle when he busts through door) "You're alright, old man? You don't look so good."
  • (To Uncle when he attacks Abigail) "Uncle, you dumb son of a bitch, stop!"
  • (After shooting Uncle) "Nobody puts their hands on my wife!"
  • (After shooting Uncle) "You son-of-a-bitch! After all we've done for you!"
  • (After shooting Uncle) "What'd you do to her, you sick bastard?!"
  • (After shooting Uncle) "You brought this on yourself!"
  • (After shooting Uncle) "This is your own fault!"
  • (Talking to Herbert Moon) "Have you ever met a Jewish person?" (Herbert answers: "Thankfully not.") "Or a British Catholic homosexual?" (Herbert answers: "Not in my store!")
  • (When looting a human) "It is every man for themselves"
  • (When looting a human) "Guess I should take it before the Undead do"
  • (When looting a human) "I can be soulless too."
  • (When looting a human) "Waste not, want not"
  • (When looting a human) "Drastic times call for drastic measures"
  • (When looting a female) "Times is scarce, lady"
  • (When looting a human) "Survival of the fittest right now"
  • (When looting a human) "It's either me or... someone eats you"
  • (When entering the Escalera Catacombs) "I always told my son - never go into dark places with strangers"

Fighting Zombies[]

  • "Next time, try not believin' in reincarnation!"
  • "You ain't coming back from that!"
  • "You're done with this world!"
  • "Stop trying to bite me!"
  • "See you in Heaven."
  • "You sick bastards!"
  • "Please just die, again!"
  • "Come on then, numbskulls!
  • "Get back, you fiend!"
  • "I'll kill you like the animals you are!"
  • "I hope Heaven's better the second time around!"
  • "Consider yourself cured!"
  • "Goddamn cannibals!"
  • "I'll kill as many of you as come at me!"
  • "Just try and bite me again!"
  • "Damn you all!"
  • "Get lost, freak!"
  • "Now please just stay dead!"
  • "You're going back to hell!"
  • "I'll make you wish you'd stay dead!"
  • "You think i'm scared of you?"
  • "No, you ain't drinking my blood!"
  • "I'm doing YOU the favor!"
  • "You just don't give up, do you?!"
  • "I don't want a hug!"
  • "Now maybe you'll stay dead!"
  • "You're going down, slow mind!"
  • "Is that a beauty spot, or your eyeball hangin' out?"
  • "You lot seem to like getting shot!"
  • "I think you need a doctor."
  • "Would you just die already?!"
  • "I ain't becoming one of you!"
  • "You're all dead, you sick freaks!"
  • "I'll shoot you as many times as it takes!"
  • "Give the Devil my regards."
  • "You ain't taking me with you!"
  • "Hopefully this time you stay dead!"
  • "I can honestly say I'm puttin' you out of your misery!"
  • "You ain't eating me!"
  • "Can't eat my soul, friend!"
  • "I'll kill you three times!"
  • "Rest in everlasting torment!"
  • "For the love of God!"
  • "You need more than a doctor"
  • "You keep coming, I'll keep shooting!"
  • "I ain't on the menu, you hear?!"
  • "Only thing that's gonna cure you is a bullet to the head."
  • "You're long past a doctor's visit my friend"
  • "I don't care how many times I have to kill you!"
  • "Did your momma not teach you it's rude to eat a fella's head?"
  • "I'll blow your nonexistent brains out!"
  • "Where the Hell are you all coming from?!"
  • "How many of these freaks do I have to shoot?"
  • "Like shooting dumb fish in a big barrel!"
  • (Under breath)"These freaks are starting to annoy me..."
  • (Pushing a zombie) "Get this stinkin' corpse away from me!"
  • (Pushing a zombie) "Guess what? You ain't eating me!"
  • (Pushing a zombie)"Get the Hell off me!"
  • (When fighting zombies in the catacombs) "This is for Uncle!"
  • (After shooting a Zombie a few times) "Die, die, DIE GODDAMMIT!"
  • (After killing a bolter) "Quick little fucker."
  • (After killing a bolter) "Goodnight you slippery booger!"
  • (After killing a bolter) "Human cockroach!"
  • (After killing a bolter) " Walk on 2 feet next time!"
  • (After killing a bolter) "That oughta slow you down."
  • (After killing a bolter) "Slippery bastard!"
  • (After killing a bolter) "Are you gonna stop now?"
  • (After killing a bolter) "No more of that slippery nonsense"
  • (After killing a bruiser) "Big fat freak!"
  • (After killing a bruiser) "Good night, fatty!"
  • (After killing a bruiser) "Thank you and goodnight you big, brainless, bastard!"
  • (After killing a bruiser) "The bigger they are, the harder they fall!"
  • (After killing a bruiser) "Take that you lumbering sack of shit!"
  • (After killing a retcher) "Didn't your mom tell you not to spit?"
  • (After killing a retcher) "Shit-spitting piece of crap!"
  • (After kiilling a retcher) Now look at the mess you made!"
  • (After being hit by a retcher's spit attack) "That's just disgusting."
  • (After killing an undead animal) "Is there anything that ain't infected?"
  • (After killing an undead animal) "And stay dead!"
  • (After killing an undead animal) "There's a good boy!"
  • (After killing an undead animal) "Enjoy your trip BACK to Animal Hell."
  • (Pistol Whipping/Rifle Butting a zombie) "I'll smash your empty head in!"
  • (Killing Jonah and Eli) "I miss the old times, fellas!"
  • (Killing Jonah and Eli) "You never did like me!"
  • (Killing Jonah and Eli) "You didn't have a brain between you!"
  • (Killing Drew MacFarlane) "Sorry, Mr. MacFarlane. You were a good man."
  • (During a grapple execution) "Sorry, but you were getting too intimate for my liking."
  • (During a grapple execution) "I DON'T LIKE HUGS!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "Let GO!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "Damn you!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "I told you not to try eating me!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "I ain't telling you again!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "STOP!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "There goes your head freak!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "You asked for it!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "That should shut you up!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "Sorry!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "You freaks are starting to annoy me!"
  • (During a grapple execution) "That'll calm you down!"
  • (Failing a grapple) 'DAMN! NO!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "DAMN!!!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "NO! NOOOO!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "GET OFF ME!!!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "NOOOOO!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "CHRIST!!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "OH SHIT!!!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "YOU BIT ME! YOU BASTARD!!!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "YOU GOT ME!! YOU SHIT!!!"
  • (Failing a grapple) "ABIGAIL, JACK! I LOVE YOU BOTH!!!"
  • (Realizing he's out of ammo) "Aw, crap!"
  • (Realizing he's out of ammo) "Aw damn, no ammo!"
  • (Realizing he's out of ammo) "Not now!"
  • (Realizing he's out of ammo) "Now? NOW?! Damn!"
  • (Realizing he's out of ammo)"For Christ's sake!"
  • (Realizing he's out of ammo) "I'm in trouble now!"

Savepoint Loaded[]

  • "I miss killing my former friends; at least that made sense."
  • "I hope I'm gonna wake up soon."
  • "Come on, now, snap out of it!"
  • "I must be losin' my mind."
  • "I deserve this..."
  • "This can't be real."
  • "Now I'm talking to myself!"
  • "Sometimes I think I've been drugged"
  • "Never in all my days!"
  • "This is some crazy nonsense!"

Looting Zombies[]

  • (When looting a zombie) "Seth... finally, I've joined you."
  • (When looting a zombie) "Seth, how do you enjoy this?"
  • (When looting a zombie) "Seth, I'm sorry about all the insults."
  • (When looting a zombie) "Abigail, Jack, the things I do for you."
  • (When looting a zombie) "Come on... PLEASE don't spit on me."
  • (When looting a zombie) "More than happy to rob you as well."
  • (When looting a zombie) "I think I looted you the first time you died!"
  • (When looting a zombie) "The least you can do after trying to eat me"
  • (When looting a zombie) "Don't you come back alive again now."
  • (When looting a zombie) "Now this is a new low...." (Said with different inflections)
  • (When looting a zombie) "Apocalypse tax!"
  • (When looting a zombie) "You claw at my back, I claw at yours"
  • (When looting a zombie) "Ugh..." *said while sounding genuinely sick to his stomach
  • (When looting a zombie) "You owe me lady."
  • (When looting a zombie) "I think I'm gonna vomit." *said while sounding genuinely sick to his stomach*
  • (When looting a zombie) "Seth, I've finally joined you."
  • (When looting a zombie) "The Undead are creepy"
  • (When looting a zombie) "ugh,... yuck."
  • (When looting a zombie) "Shouldn't have tried to bite me, should ya?"
  • (When looting a zombie) "Think I looted you the first time you died..."
  • (When looting a female zombie) "I'd have been more of a gentleman if you had been more of a lady."
  • (When looting a female zombie) "Sorry, lady... about how things turned out."
  • (When looting a female zombie) "Sorry miss, apocalypse tax."
  • (When looting a female zombie) "This is for tryin' to kill me, lady."
  • (When looting a female zombie) "Ain't much of a lady."
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Damn this shit!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Damn this godforsaken shit-hole!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "I knew this was a waste of time." (Said with different inflections)
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Damn it to hell."
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "That about sums up my luck recently"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "I'm beginning to lose my patience!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "You're trying my patience!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Useless!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Bullshit!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Not again!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "I knew this was a waste of time!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "For Christ's sake!"
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Well that's unfortunate."
  • (After an unsuccessful loot) "Well that didn't go so well."

Taunting Zombies (Circle or B)[]

  • "Ain't you a barrel of laughs?"
  • "You dumb freak!"
  • "I've seen fencepost smarter than you!"
  • "You can't even walk straight!"
  • "Why don't you try walking straight!"
  • "What a pitiful excuse for a corspe!"
  • "What's goin' on in that empty head of yours?"
  • "You brainless freak of nature!"
  • "Why don't I bite you? See how you like it!"
  • "You should've stayed in your coffin!"
  • "I bet you don't even got the disease!"
  • "At least now you fit in with folks!"
  • "In many ways, I reckon this affliction has improved you!"
  • "What's that? I can't understand you!"
  • "You're the sorriest sight I ever laid eyes on!"
  • "Dumb, greedy, and incapable of speaking clearly. That you Bill?"
  • "You missed a bit by your mouth".
  • "I doubt it'd the first time anyone's called you ugly."
  • "You're a disgrace to the dead!"
  • "You brainless freak of nature!"
  • "Even the devil must be ashamed of you!"
  • "You ever consider a career in the circus?"
  • "Why don't you try speaking English?"
  • "At least now no one can call you particularly ugly!"
  • "You walk funny friend!"
  • "Look at this, a whole head full of nothing"
  • "You're dumber than a farm animal!"
  • "Shut up! You're like a pig in a trough!"
  • "Not very lady-like are you?"
  • "You're quite the beauty ain't you?"
  • "Is that a beauty spot or your eyeball hanging out?"
  • "Lady you're revolting."
  • "Ain't you just fine?"
  • "I thought ladies were supposed to eat with their mouths shut!"
  • "My god, you look fine!"
  • "You sure are ugly now sister!"
  • "I bet no one fucks you in Hell!"
  • "Why don't you try acting like a lady?"
  • "Went a little overboard with the rouge don't you think?"
  • What's wrong with you sister?"
  • "Stop moaning like a cheap whore!"
  • Well ain't you one ugly old maid!"
  • "I doubt it's the first time someone's called you ugly!"
  • "Even the dead shouldn't smell that bad!" *adds "lady" for females*
  • "Stop grunting like a pregnant sow!"
  • "What is wrong with you?"
  • "I think you need a doctor, lady"
  • "Just how I like my women! Deranged, dumb, and spitting mad!"
  • "Take a look at you sister! Ain't you just dandy?"
  • I hope you were better looking alive lady!"
  • "You smell like week old shit in the sun, lady!"
  • "You're drooling miss."
  • "I'm surprised even Hell let you in!"
  • "You sure as shit are a freak!"
  • "Look at you, you freak!"
  • "Of all these freaks you might be the most hideous!"
  • "Shouldn't you be getting back to eternal damnnation?"
  • "You make the village idiot look like a genius!"
  • "Partner you don't look so good!"
  • "Go on! Say a word, give me one word!"
  • "Make the most of your short return on this Earth my friend!"
  • "Approaching everlasting bedtime for you mister!"
  • "You're dumber than Fordham."

Helping People[]

  • We ain't gonna beat this curse if we don't band together.
  • There ain't nothin' nice about any of this. Good luck to you.
  • If I'd left you there, you'd be droolin' from the mouth by now.
  • I wasn't going to just ride by and let them eat you alive.
  • Best of luck to you. Try to stay safe.
  • Travel safely and stay away from anyone groaning.
  • Not a problem. It didn't really look like a fair fight.
  • Don't Mention it. Now find somewhere safe and stay there.
  • I'm just sorry it had to be that way.
  • What you doing out here, anyway? Ain't you seen what's going on?
  • You're welcome. Now get inside somewhere and board up the doors.

Other[]

  • "What if there's no cure?"
  • "Man, now I'm talking to myself..."
  • "The whole world is gone crazy!"
  • "Abigail, I've failed you."
  • "Oh my good god!"
  • "I have lost my damn mind.. I hope"
  • "What am I doing here?"
  • "Pull it together!"
  • "This is madness!"
  • "What the hell!?"
  • "I shoulda gone to church more..."
  • (Walking into under attack settlement) "The world is literally going to hell in a hand basket!" (possible reference to Bill from Left 4 Dead, who sometimes says "This is going to Hell in a hand basket real fast!")
  • "This is carnage!"
  • (When talking to sasquatch) "You eat babies!"
  • (Walking into under-attack settlement) "This is a living hell!"
  • (Walking into under-attack settlement) "Whole world gone crazy!"
  • (Aiming gun at a human) "How do I know you're not infected?"
  • (Aiming gun at a human) "You got the plague friend?"
  • (Aiming gun at a human) "Are you sick mister? Show me!"
  • (Aiming gun at a human) "Don't annoy me! Or you'll be some corpse's lunch!"
  • (Aiming gun at a human) "The undead are the least of your worries friend!"
  • (Aiming gun at a human) "How do I know you're safe?"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Got you now freak!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Devil creature!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "This is some crazy nonsense!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Goddamn demon!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "This is pure madness!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Nature sure is messed up!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "What on Earth is wrong with you creature?!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "This is what Hell has brought?!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "These Goddamn creatures!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "What is wrong with you freak?!
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Deranged creature!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Easy now, deranged maniac!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "How'd I get myself into this?!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "I must be out of my mind!"
  • (While breaking a horse of the apocalypse) "Whole world's gone crazy!"
  • (While hogtying a female zombie) "Only my wife gets to bite me!"
  • (Greeting) "How's the end of the world treating you?"
  • (Greeting) "Glad to see another survivor."
  • (Greeting) "You stay away from them zombies, miss."
  • (Greeting) "Ain't many of us left, mister."
  • (Greeting) "Stay safe, mister."
  • (Greeting) "Someone who ain't tryin' to eat me."
  • (Greeting) "You're not infected, are you?"
  • (Greeting) "You should be locked inside, miss."
  • (Greeting) "You take care of yourself, mister. Don't get bit."
  • (Greeting) "You keep safe now."
  • (Greeting) "Hanging in there, partner?"
  • (Obtaining Ammo from chest) "More valuable than gold now!"
  • (Greeting) "Try not to get eaten by the undead sir"
  • (Greeting) "Good to see someone not spittin' bile"
  • (Greeting) "We're alive. That's somethin'"
  • (After picking up Semi-Auto Shotgun) "Looks like Reyes brought some protection with him."

As a zombie/revenant[]

  • "Hi." (Demonically distorted)
  • "Thank you." (Distorted demonically)


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